The Old Blog

Once a must-read, Dan Shanoff’s “Daily Quickie” on ESPN.com has been on such a downward slope for the past 18 months, it’s almost unbelievable to think I used to start my day with it.

Following ESPN’s lead, Shanoff has decided to make outrageous, illogical claims about all things sports, with little to back him up save for quotes that work better on sports talk radio than in reality. His “reasoning” behind choosing Steve Nash for MVP may be the worst example of thinking something through since my high school girlfriend yelled at me for telling her the same thing both too soon and not soon enough.

Every week something is anointed as “the best ever.” It used to be “the best of the (conveniently named) ESPN era,” but Shanoff’s addiction to irresponsible hyperbole got the better of him. We’ve had the “best postseason ever,” “best performance ever” in about 8 different sports, the “most dominant athletes ever,” “best sports weekend ever,” “best sports weekday ever,” “best NCAA opening round ever,” and a host of other superlatives that are both desensitizing and wrong. What does it say when Barry Bonds’ 2001 season gets the same treatment from Shanoff as some random 14-over-3 upset in the NCAA tourney?

Today’s column is a perfect example of why the Quickie will soon join the work of Scoop Jackson, Joe Morgan, Jason Whitlock, and John Kruk on the list of ESPN articles I refuse to read based on author alone.

Shanoff starts by comparing Tony Graffanino’s error last night in Game Two of the ALDS to both Bill Buckner’s error in the 1986 World Series and the until recently ubiquitous “Curse of the Bambino.” You want hyperbole? Let’s try comparing Babe Ruth to Mark Freakin’ Bellhorn! Let’s try comparing a team that was one strike away from winning the World Series to one that had a four-run lead in Game Two of the first round of the playoffs. Let’s try comparing a fielding error to Grady Little’s still unbelievable decision to leave Pedro Martinez in about three batters too long in the 2003 ALCS. Let’s try calling David Wells an “ALDS Choker” when he gave up two earned runs in 6 1/3 innings - a quality start, for those keeping score at home.

I’d start on Shanoff’s complete inability to grasp the definition of the word “irony” (hint: it’s not coincidence), but that’s a problem that plagues a large segment of the population.

But that’s only the first section of today”s Quickie. Shanoff then claims that T-Graff’s (yeah, that nickname won’t stick) error saved A-Rod from being the goat of the night. The analysis that follows is typical Shanoff: take a single, out of the ordinary play and use it as “proof” that A-Rod isn’t the MVP (you know, as opposed to all the good plays he made throughout the season). Follow that by claiming David Ortiz is more valuable as a DH because he can’t make errors.

Hell, by that rationale, I’m even more valuable, because as someone who’s not on the roster, I can’t make errors or even get out! I don’t think I’m out of line when I suggest that an MVP is someone who succeeds at the chances they’re given, rather than someone who is kept away from opportunities to fail.

And just to prove that Shanoff should think before he types, he contradicts himself in the “Odds & Ends” portion of the Quickie, deciding to attribute the Red Sox’ loss to Boston’s lack of clutch hitting in the final four innings of the game. If the Red Sox win their two games at home this weekend, expect Shanoff to write a full “Boston’s got the magic” section, as well as a claim that it’s the “best comeback ever.”