According to a CNN poll, most Americans feel that going into Iraq was a mistake.
According to a FOX News Poll, 98 percent of Americans wish they could be in Iraq right now, and 83 percent of those also think Hillary Clinton is Satan.
It’s 18. Though I’d suggest Ken Jennings invest some of his winnings in a little plastic surgery to space out his facial features.
Two rumors I’ve heard are that Jennings will lose after 38 days and that said losses will occur with a plumber as one of his opponents. Tune back in sometime in late July and see if they’re true.
A Texas couple is one of at least three sets of parents in the US to have named their child “ESPN.” And now the kid’s gonna be on TV. Do we really want to encourage this sort of behavior?
He was also confused as to what day it was, but that isn’t really news.
Maybe I should use a version of this headline every day.
Anyway, Lee Iacocca has switched parties and now supports John Kerry, despite being involved in Bush ads four years ago.
On the other side of the aisle, “democrat” Zell Miller is going to speak at the Republican National Convention. Of course, over the past few years, Miller has been about as democratic as I have been feline.
And in some other aisle, or possibly outside the building that contains the aisles, the Green Party, possibly considering the ramifications of another four years of Bush, decided not to nominate Ralph Nader as their presidential candidate. Instead, the Greens nominated David Cobb, which means there will be at least one candidate from Texas on the Presidential ballot (remember, Bush spent most of his formative years in Connecticut, despite what he’d have you believe).
ESPN’s Dream Job is back. Because the first version apparently wasn’t crappy or disturbing enough.
Memo to Mike Hall* wannabes: get a schtick to make it onto the show (like yelling a lot, singing during your audition, or having no neck), but then clean up and dress preppy once you’re on the actual show.
*Mike Hall won the first season. But of course you already knew that.
Johan Santana (who is a month younger than me) is leading the American League in strikeouts!
Last Twin to do that over a full season? Camilo Pascual, who did it in each of the team’s first three years of existence.
I see a lot of dumb ads, so I’ll try to make this a regular feature here.
Today’s stupid ad: Budweiser.
Miller Lite has the amusing “President of Beers” campaign, in which they propose their brew’s candidacy for the aforementioned fictional post, while poking a little fun at Budweiser, the (tyrannical) King of Beers.
Budweiser, despite being the most popular beer in America (and one of the biggest spenders on advertising in any industry), couldn’t take it with good humor, however, and decided to bring back their lizards to fight back.
In a recent ad, the lizards discuss how Miller is not eligible for president of beers since they were bought by a South African company, and how the ad agency behind such a campaign did a terrible job.
Here are my problems with this:
1) Miller was “born” in the USA, and even though they are owned by a company in another country, they could still claim American citizenship, were there such a thing for beer. It’s not like Heineken is claiming to be an all-American beer; this is Miller Lite, dammit!
2) Budweiser is the big dog on the block here–do they really need to beat up on Miller Lite?
3) “President of Beers” is a fictional title. There’s no such thing, Budweiser! So why get all technical about it?
4) Even if you don’t like Miller’s campaign, you have to admit that “traveshamockery” is a great word.
5) The Miller campaign is amusing–at least the first 60 times you see it. And that crappy ad agency apparently got Budweiser’s (and Wonkette’s)
attention, so they couldn’t have done that bad a job.
6) If it was bad that Miller paid that agency for the original ads, it’s much worse that Bud is paying for ads to dispute what they have just spent thousands of dollars and hours of airtime describing as a bad job.
Update: (6/27/04) Check out this article by Seth Stevenson of Slate, in which he made most of the same arguments I just did.
Remember that scene in 1984 when the government spokesperson changes history (and allies) mid-sentence?
Apparently our President learned something from that passage when he claimed that most of Europe supported the war in Iraq during an interview on Irish TV.
Oliver Willis found some incredibly contradictory information–from a little more reliable source.
Quick Question: If Dick Cheney tells Patrick Leahy to go fuck himself, and it’s aired on C-SPAN within a week of the new obscenity fine hike, does he now owe $275,000?
He should probably go hang out with Scalia again, to see what the Justice’s…er…opinion might be on such a question.